The Caretaker
by 2queens1prince
Summary: Another origin story that begins much earlier than college.
1. Chapter 1

AN: So, it's been a little bit, but I come bearing a new multi-chapter. When I shot the story idea to my friends, I think they were both a little apprehensive and said, "You might be able to pull it off." I guess we're about to see if I did! It isn't super long, only 9 chapters. I hope you enjoy it.

November 1975

With his breath hanging in a white cloud in the frigid cold, Henry McCord tapped his stick against the ice. The puck dropped and they were off. Pushing and shoving each other, they worked their way across the lake toward the makeshift goal. Henry drew back, ready to send the puck flying into the goal, when the toe of Bart Thompson's stick came smacking down on the back of Henry's hand.

Henry jumped. He wasn't playing hockey. He was sitting in Sr. Bernadette's 6th grade religion class, and he didn't get hit by a hockey stick, but by Sister's ruler. The class all snickered. Sr. Bernadette towered over Henry. "Mr. McCord, would you please answer the question?"

"And what was the question, Sister?" Smack. The ruler came down hard across his knuckles. He winced, but said nothing. "_Damn, that smarts,"_ he thought.

"Corporal works of mercy, Mr. McCord. How can one actively live out the work of mercy 'bury the dead?""

"Don't leave dead people in the streets," Henry said, straightfaced, prepared to get whacked again, but it didn't happen. The class was openly laughing, and Sr. Bernadette's eyes narrowed.

"Mr. McCord. You will be spending the next four afternoons working in the cemetery with me. Be sure you explain this to your parents so they won't be concerned with regard to your whereabouts the rest of the week." She turned and walked away. Henry sighed. No hockey for him for a few days.

A few days ended up being a few weeks, because once Henry's father, Patrick, found out that he had been assigned cemetery duty because of his smart mouth, the punishment was tripled. In total, Henry spent sixteen days scrubbing gravestones, making minor repairs with the help of the cemetery caretaker, and placing Christmas wreaths on every grave in the Our Lady of Good Counsel parish cemetery.

Of course, Henry would have rather spent the afternoons playing hockey, but he found that he didn't really mind the work. Sr. Bernadette spent a lot of time talking about the importance of praying for the dead and for the peace of their loved ones and asking for their intercession as saints in heaven. Henry found it interesting to read the gravestones and come up with scenarios about the lives of people from years ago. What might have happened that several family members died at once or within days of each other? Were they ill or was there an accident? He spent hours pondering these things while he worked.

In case sixteen days wasn't enough to really drive the point home, Henry's mom, Lucy dragged him to three funeral dinners, where he carried the piping hot crock of green beans his mother made and walked around all of the tables refilling tea glasses. By the time Christmas break rolled around, Henry thought he'd done more to actively live "bury the dead," than almost every Catholic he knew.

New Year's Day 1976

Henry was sitting in the middle of his bedroom floor, working diligently on the Erector set he'd received for Christmas, when he heard the phone ring in the background. He didn't flinch. He never received phone calls. They were all for his 14 year old sister, Maureen, so he was surprised when his mom called up the stairs. "Henry, phone. It's Tommy Johnson."

Henry jumped to his feet and scrambled down the stairs, nearly running into the end of the couch in his haste to get the call. "Hello?"

"Hey Henry. It's Tommy. We're all going to play hockey this afternoon. Are you out of the doghouse yet?"

Henry groaned, "I don't know. What time? If I can, I will be there."

"1:30. Good luck man," Tommy said.

"Yeah, thanks." Henry barely replaced the receiver in the cradle when he took off toward the kitchen calling, "Moooooommmm."

Reluctantly Lucy agreed, and Henry found himself, new hockey stick in hand (his gift from Santa), on his way to the city park lake. Many of the guys were already gathered. Teams were chosen and the game began. It was like every other time they'd played until Bobby took a wild shot and sent the puck sliding off to the middle of the large lake. Without a second thought, Tommy took off across the ice to retrieve it. He made it to within ten feet of the puck, when the ice broke and he fell through.

"Get help!" Henry screamed to one of the other boys, shoving him toward solid ground. Henry skated out as far as he knew he was safe and then went down on his belly, scooting toward the break. Tommy hadn't come up, and Henry couldn't shake the feeling of dread and panic that grew as he neared the hole. He was right at the edge when he felt someone grab his ankle and, looking over his shoulder, saw all of the boys had formed a line, ready to haul them out, if only he could reach Tommy.

"Toooommmmmyyy!" Henry called over and over again, his arms flailing in the water, trying to catch hold of anything. Without warning, Henry felt himself being pulled back. "Noooooo. We've got to save him." Finally turning, he saw the fire and ambulance crews had arrived and were already making their way out to the hole in the ice.

It was three hours later, and nearly dark, when the dive team retrieved Tommy's body. Henry and all of the other boys sat huddled in blankets at the water's edge praying fervently for a miracle that did not come. One by one, the boys were forced by their parents to leave, after offering condolences to Tommy's shocked and grief stricken parents. Henry was the last to approach them, and stood sobbing in front of Tommy's parents begging for forgiveness. "I'm so sorry. I tried to save him," Henry said, his words coming out between choked sobs.

Tommy's mother hugged Henry, and kissed the top of his head, and through her own tears spoke. "I know you did. Sometimes bad things happen and we can't possibly know why." She broke down, her voice cracking. "Thank you for being Tommy's friend."

Four days later

Henry sat stoically between his parents in the fourth pew from the front at Our Lady of Good Counsel. All of the boys that were at the lake that day sat in reserved pews behind the family. It was important to the Johnsons that Tommy's friends be close. Doing his best to hold it together, Henry distracted himself by reading the program that had the order of the service and Tommy's obituary in it. It was typical until he got to the bottom where it said _Interment: Riverview Cemetery, Charlottesville, Virginia._

Henry elbowed Lucy and pointed. "What does that mean?" he whispered.

Lucy looked at the paper. "They are going to bury Tommy in Charlottesville where his grandparents are buried. Remember they came from that area when they moved here a few years ago?"

Henry was devastated. "Who's going to visit his grave? Who's going to take care of it? Don't his parents know?" He was speaking in hushed tones, but Patrick put his hand on Henry's leg and squeezed it, hard, to make a point. Henry fell silent, the thoughts still swirling in his head.

Summer 1976

Henry had just finished mowing the neighbor's lawn and ran into the house through the back door. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Tommy's parents sitting at the kitchen table with his own-everyone looking very serious. "Hello Mr. and Mrs. Johnson." An uneasiness fell over him and the adults stared at each other, not really knowing what to say.

Finally Mr. Johnson spoke up. "Henry, you know how we moved from Charlottesville to Pittsburgh for my job? Well, since Tommy-" he paused, still unable to say the word "died" without breaking down. "Since Tommy's accident, I've been trying to get a transfer. It finally came through. We are moving back to Charlottesville. There are just too many bad memories here. We need to be closer to our family."

Henry shifted his weight. "Thanks for coming to tell me." Henry wasn't really sure what else to say. It didn't seem right to tell Tommy's parents that they needed to make sure to go and visit their son's grave. He was sure they would anyway. Instead he said, "When you get there, tell Tommy I said hello and that I think about him all of the time." Then he headed up the stairs, roughly wiping the tears from his eyes.

Fall 1980

Henry sat at the dining room table surrounded by college brochures. They seemed to arrive ten at a time since Henry started his junior year and did well on the college entrance exam. "I don't see why you think you need to go to college," Patrick muttered in the background. "It's a hell of a lot cheaper to go ahead and start working. The union pays well. You could start at $300/week. That's big money for a 17 year old."

"I know Dad, but I want the chance to go out and see the world. I want to join the military. If I do ROTC, I can get a degree and see the world. I think I might want to teach." Patrick rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the TV.

In the background, the phone rang and Lucy picked it up. Henry heard her gasp and both Henry and Patrick turned to see what was going on. They heard Lucy murmur her thanks and hang up the phone. She stood silently at the end of the couch, he hand still resting on the phone. "What is it?" Patrick asked, rising.

Lucy let out a shaky breath. "That was Claire from the church rectory. She said she received a call and Ralph and Mary Johnson are dead."

"What?" Patrick asked, his voice much too loud. She nodded and Patrick moved toward his wife.

"Tommy's mom and dad?" Henry asked, confused. "How?"

"Carbon monoxide poisoning. It seems something went wrong with their furnace when they turned it on. A neighbor found them dead this morning. They think it happened a couple days ago when it first turned cold down there. I just can't believe it." Lucy's voice cracked and Patrick pulled her to sit on the couch next to him.

Henry leaned against the dining room chair he'd been sitting on. "Do they have other family down there?"

Lucy shook her head. "I don't think so. Ralph's aunt died last spring. I think that was the last of the family they had. So sad."

Henry sighed, "Yeah, it is." He turned and stacked up the brochures. "I think I'm going to go on up to my room." He gave his mom a hug and squeezed his dad's shoulder and silently climbed the stairs.

He emerged from the bathroom and caught sight of the bookcase at the end of the hall next to his bedroom. It held a complete set of World Book Encyclopedias. He pulled the U-V volume and stepped into his room, closing the door.

Sitting with his back against the headboard Henry opened the book and thumbed through until he came across the entry he was looking for-Virginia. Turning the pages slowly, he stopped and carefully read the section entitled, "Education." Learning that the University of Virginia was located in Charlottesville, he flipped back to the letter U, and finding what he needed there, he read carefully.

He discovered that UVA had an ROTC program and that made the decision for him. He would go to Charlottesville and take care of Tommy and his family. He would be the caretaker.


	2. Chapter 2

AN: Thank you so much for the kind reviews. I appreciate them all.

Chapter 2

Spring 1983

It was a bright and sunny Thursday morning in early April when Henry pulled into the cemetery. For the past seven months, he had been dropping by every other week to visit the graves. Sometimes he just drove by to drop off flowers, sometimes he prayed and other times, he did actual maintenance. This particular day, he was on a mission, armed with a tube of epoxy and a caulk gun. One of the vases on Tommy's grandparents' headstone had been knocked off by a large tree limb during a recent thunderstorm and Henry was going to fix it.

He parked at the edge of the circle drive and made his way across the grass. Henry took notice of the funeral canopy that had been set up twenty or so graves down from where he was. He swallowed hard as he saw that two graves had been dug, and he thought of Tommy's parents. Some family lost two loved ones. Glancing at his watch, he saw that it was nearing 11:30 and decided to hurry so that he wouldn't be hanging out when they arrived.

Henry quickly cleaned the area and applied the epoxy, reattaching the vase to the headstone. Once his mess was all cleaned up, he said a quick prayer and headed back to his car. Driving the long, single lane winding road through the cemetery, Henry pulled off as neared the entrance and parked, letting the two hearses, limousine and extraordinarily long line of cars enter. They drove the entire loop and parked near Henry, and he watched as an older couple emerged from the limousine, followed by blond headed teens. Being the same height, Henry wondered if they were twins. He felt deep sympathy for the family, having lost two members at once. Saying a quick prayer, he pulled away and out onto the road back to UVA.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Elizabeth Adams was curled up in the middle of an unfamiliar bed with the quilt pulled over her head, but she wasn't sleeping. She didn't think she'd slept at all since the night before her parents were killed in a car accident.

She heard the creak of the door. Elizabeth noted that her bedroom door at home was silent when it opened. Now, nothing was the same, and it would never be the same again. "Lizzie?" Her grandfather's voice was timid, and the fact that it was so unlike him just made the whole situation all the more real.

Elizabeth felt the bed dip next to her and his hand on her shoulder. "We need to go Lizzie. It's time to go to the church." He peeled the covers back and she felt exposed, like he'd peeled back her flesh, exposing her broken heart.

When she wasn't able to move, he pulled her up and helped her to her feet. "We'll lean on each other," he whispered, leading her out of the room.

Fall 1983

Henry arrived back at UVA two weeks before classes started so he could get his apartment set up. He was thrilled to finally have his own place. After moving the furniture in and getting most of the big stuff unpacked, Henry made the trek to Riverview to see how the Johnsons had fared over the summer.

As he started to approach from the far side of the drive, he stopped when he saw the same kids he'd seen that spring. They were standing side by side for just a moment, until the boy stepped away, leaving the girl behind.

Henry felt like he was intruding on a private moment even though he was quite a distance away. He thought about retreating to his car until they left, but he couldn't get his feet to move. Finally she touched her fingers to her lips and then placed them on the top of the headstone. She wiped her tears away and then walked back, climbing into the back seat of a car driven by an older man, an older woman in the front seat. They pulled away and she didn't look back.

Henry took care of his business, but before he left, he wandered over to where the kids had been standing. "Benjamin and Suzanne Adams," he murmured. " 40 and 38." "_Even younger than Tommy's parents when they died."_ he thought. "Sad." he said, but smiled at the fresh flowers that adorned the vase. They were caretakers too.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

"Come on Lizzie. We need a change. It will be good." Elizabeth could hear Will talking, but his words were fuzzy and meaningless. Her head lay against the window as they made the two hour drive to Chatham, Virginia. He put his hand on her arm and she turned to him. "Try to be happy," he said.

Elizabeth didn't know that it was possible for the situation to get worse, but here she was, and it was worse. Her parents had died. Her sun and moon. Her everything. Aunt Joan had been granted guardianship over her and her younger brother, Will, but she lived in Fredericksburg, which was closer to two hours from her hometown of Charlottesville.

Her grandparents lived across town from her house, where she grew up. They stayed there at first, so they could finish the school year. But, now, Joan had insisted they go to boarding school. Her own job, she stated, required too much travel. Elizabeth begged to be allowed to stay with her grandparents, with her friends, but in the end, it was her grandparents who said they didn't feel they were able to keep her and her brother. It didn't help that Will was totally on board. Since their parents had died, he'd been looking for any excuse to leave Charlottesville, to escape. And as much as Will ran from home, Elizabeth clung to it.

She was outvoted, not that she thought the process had been democratic at all, and now they were turning into Hargrave Military Academy, an all boys boarding school that Will would attend. After helping Will carry his things in and meeting his roommate, Elizabeth retreated to the steps outside the massive building. She talked to her parents and asked them to give her strength to channel her sadness into something useful.

An hour later, she was standing in her room at Chatham Hall. She met her roommate, Mary. Her new uniforms were hanging in her closet, her school books stacked on her desk. "It's time," her grandmother said. Elizabeth followed them down the stairs and out to the parking lot.

"I know it's hard," her grandfather whispered when he hugged her goodbye. "You'll figure out a way to make good come out of it. I know you will." She bit the inside of her cheek and willed herself not to cry, a skill she honed in recent months. Nodding, she gave her grandmother a quick hug and watched them get into the car and drive off.

She looked around her and realized that she was on her own. Those tears threatened to fall until she caught sight of the stable. Perhaps she had found a way out.

Fall 1986

Elizabeth stepped out of her freshman dorm and looked out across campus. UVA's stately brick buildings surrounded her and concrete walkways criss-crossed the lush green grass making intricate patterns. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. The weight in her chest that had been a constant companion since she had to go to Chatham was lifted. She was home. She smiled and, this time, it was genuine.

Her grandfather was right. Elizabeth had figured out a way to make good come out of Chatham Hall. She excelled in academics and earned the title of class valedictorian. That was a given. Studying had always been her escape, but riding became her healing.

Her first semester, Elizabeth dropped choir to take Introduction to Horsemanship and on the first day, was hooked. She spent the rest of her three years spending as much time at the stable as her studies would allow. She couldn't verbalize it, but there was something so freeing about giving herself over, to just hold on and let the horse be in charge. When she rode, she felt free, letting the despair go. With each ride, she left a little of that sadness behind, until one day, she was herself, not her original self, but the new version-the one that had survived. Her senior year, she picked up a boyfriend, the stablehand, and eventually lost her virginity in the hayloft. They parted ways when she graduated, both knowing it wasn't meant to be a lifelong relationship, but she recalled their time fondly.

Her grandmother died of an aneurysm the summer after her sophomore year and she swore that the cause of her grandfather's death six months later was due to a broken heart. Now, Joan was back in Fredericksburg, and Will had another year at Hargrave. A few years ago, she would have felt lost without her family by her, but not now. She still missed them terribly and wished that she was closer to Will, but they never had the close sibling relationship that some of her friends had. For the most part, she came to accept it.

Elizabeth headed toward the parking lot, it was time to go visiting the family that was still in Charlottesville.

AN2: I know this deviates from canon, since we found out that Elizabeth never went to the cemetery. So, it's an AU now. *shrugs*


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Thanks for hanging in there on this one. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Chapter 3

Fall 1986

Henry was entering his first year as a graduate student. He continued to visit the cemetery every other week and each time he went, he thought about the blonde girl and her family. It had been a few years since he'd actually seen her, that day a few months after her parents died. At least he guessed that they were her parents. But, he knew she'd been there. Thanksgivings and Christmases mostly. Once there were fresh footprints in newly fallen snow. He'd just missed her.

He felt a strange connection to the girl. She seemed to have assumed the same job he had. She was the one who showed up, the one who remembered. He wondered if he'd actually ever see her again.

Henry couldn't hide his shock that August afternoon when he walked up the incline and saw her sitting on a blanket in front of her parents' grave. She sat with her legs criss-crossed in front of her. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail and her head was down, reading a book. Her body looked less tense. She seemed somehow more at peace.

Henry was certainly intrigued, and he wanted to talk to her. He knew that he had obviously thought a lot more about her than she had him, if she even knew he existed, and he didn't want to bother her, so he did his business and left her there reading. But over the next two weeks, he thought of her frequently.

When he returned the next time, Henry was disappointed that the mystery girl wasn't there, and he went ahead and put two single roses in the vase on her parents' headstone, just like he did for each member of Tommy's family.

He continued this pattern until one day in mid October. Henry showed up and she was back. This time he had yellow and orange carnations. He placed them in vases on Tommy's stone, along with his parents, grandparents and aunt. He was about to leave when he heard a voice behind him. "Why do you put flowers on my parents' grave?"

Henry spun around and sheepishly looked at the two remaining flowers in his hand. "I'm not sure exactly. Maybe because I recognize that you're the caretaker too." She scrunched up her face, not understanding. "See?" He went silent for a moment as he took in her deep blue eyes. Regaining his composure, he gestured to his side. "Tommy was my best friend. He died when I was 11. His parents used to come and visit, but then they died, so now I come. I'm the caretaker." He shrugged. "I happened to be here visiting Tommy the day your parents were buried. I saw the day you left. You didn't come back often but you came back when you could. You're here now. You're the caretaker."

She studied the man before her, still confused, yet curious enough to comment. "That still doesn't explain why you put flowers on my parents' grave."

Henry shifted uncomfortably. "No. I guess it doesn't, does it? Look, when I try to explain, this whole thing seems really creepy and I swear it isn't. So, I usually come on Thursday afternoons every other week. If you never want to see me again, avoid those times, okay? Sorry to have bothered you."

Henry backed away a few steps before turning to leave. "Hey," she called. "I don't know your name."

He stopped and turned back to her. Appraising her, he smiled. "Are you sure you want to know that?"

She returned the smile. "I think I'll take my chances."

"Henry McCord. And you are?"

She grinned, "Still deciding." She turned and walked back, picking up her blanket and book. She ran her hand over the top of the headstone before walking to her car.

Henry watched her leave. He chuckled to himself and shook his head. She was intriguing and he really hoped he got the opportunity to know her better.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Elizabeth turned from the man she now knew as Henry McCord and sauntered back to get her things. She couldn't exactly explain why, but she found him interesting-interesting enough that she approached him. Elizabeth wasn't usually so forward, nor was she flirtatious, but Mr. McCord seemed to bring out a different side of her, and she enjoyed it. She made a mental note to update her calendar when she returned to her room. In two Thursdays, she would be coming back to see her parents and, if she were lucky, Henry McCord.

Thursday, two weeks later

Henry turned into the cemetery and parked in his usual spot. Walking up the hill, Henry truthfully didn't expect to see her, but he couldn't hide his smile when she was sitting on the blanket, the same as last time. She turned and looked at him, a smile blooming across her face. "Hey stranger. I was about to give up and go back to my room."

'Your room? You're a student?" he asked, surprised. She stood and walked to meet him.

"Yes, I'm a freshman. Elizabeth Adams."

"I'm surprised to see you. What made you decide to be here, now?" he asked.

"Just a feeling. After you're done, do you want to join me for a coffee? It's getting a little chilly to be standing out here."

Henry smiled at her. When she smiled back, he felt the warmth in his chest, and he couldn't deny his attraction to her.

An hour later they sat across from each other in a small coffee shop, splitting the distance between the cemetery and campus. It had been a little awkward at first with a few uncomfortable silences, but they fell into a rhythm talking about UVA and an hour passed. It was nearly dark outside. Henry walked Elizabeth back to her car.

"Thanks for joining me," she said softly, suddenly a little unsure about how this next part was supposed to go. She knew what she wanted to happen, she just wasn't sure if he was willing.

"Thanks for deciding that I'm not creepy. I had a nice time." There was silence, and Henry was trying to decide if this would be the last time or not, when she spoke.

"How about we don't wait two weeks before we see each other again? I'm free this weekend." He watched the blush creep up her face, her words giving the impression that she was more brazen than she really was, and she was nothing short of intoxicating.

"I would love that, but I think you should know something first." Elizabeth studied him, trying to gauge where this was going. "I graduate in a year and a half, and then it will be six years in the Marines. I'm not a guy who has a string of girls at the ready. I don't date to pass time. I'm looking for the real thing. If that's not something you're interested in, I don't want to entertain the idea at all. It's not fair to either of us."

"I suppose not. I'm not specifically looking for a permanent thing, but I'm not someone who has a bunch of guys on speed dial either. If I'm dating you, then I'm dating you. If that's where it leads, then maybe it was meant to be." She grinned. "For the record, I'm talking about dinner, not betrothal, but I get what you're saying. We don't want to be in completely different places in terms of what we want."

Henry grinned. "Then, dinner Saturday night?"

"Pick me up at 7?" She leaned into her car and ripped a piece of paper from a notebook on the seat. She scribbled her dorm and phone number on it. Folding it, she offered it to him. To her surprise, he wrapped his hand around hers before slipping the paper from her hand.

"I'll be there."

After making sure she was safely in the car and it started, Henry waved and made his way down the block to get his own car. Elizabeth watched him go and found herself smiling. She couldn't wait for their Saturday night date.

Henry got into his own car and drove home. He really didn't think Elizabeth would show up, much less ask him for coffee. And now, they were going out for dinner. Elizabeth was a take charge person, and he found it exciting.


	4. Chapter 4

AN: We'll see who's still talking to me after this.

Chapter 4

Elizabeth looked at herself in the mirror again. "Good Lord, Lizzie! What the hell are you doing?" She ran her hands through her hair and fluffed it for the twentieth time. She finished getting ready an hour ago and still had thirty minutes before Henry should arrive to pick her up. Nervous energy coursed through her. "If I am this damn antsy during our date, Henry will think I'm a giant spaz. I've got to settle down."

She stepped out of her room and knocked on the door across the hall. "Come in," the muffled voice on the other side commanded.

Elizabeth opened the door. A plump girl with thick, frizzy brown hair glanced up from her beanbag chair and did a double-take. "Damn!"

Panic washed over Elizabeth. "What?" She turned and looked at herself in the full length mirror that hung on the closet door. "Is it that bad?" Her eyes studied the reflection-the soft cream flowy blouse beneath her brown tweed blazer, dark blue jeans that were molded to her narrow hips and lean legs, and heeled, over the calf, brown leather boots. "Should I change?" She started to move toward the door.

"Sit your ass down Adams. I was about to say that you're so hot that I think I want to fuck you. Who's the lucky guy?" Elizabeth's across the hall neighbor, Jess, was known for her brashness, so, even though she was a bit taken aback by the comment, she at least assumed that she looked okay. Jess pulled a cigarette from her pack, and started to light it, but stopped and just toyed with it instead. She eyed Elizabeth and Elizabeth read her expression as, "Get on with it. Can't you see I need to smoke?"

"His name is Henry," she said, leaning against the edge of the desk. "We had coffee the other day, and now we're going to dinner."

Jess gave a slight tip of her head. "You meet at the library?" Her voice was almost accusing. Jess was forever giving her shit about spending so much time at the library.

"No," Elizabeth snapped, instantaneously realizing that she just set herself up.

"Hmm, so then where did you meet Mr. Hottie?" Jess arched her eyebrows at Elizabeth.

Elizabeth thought about how to approach this, and decided a diversionary tactic was best. "I didn't say he was hot."

"So, he's not hot?"

"I didn't say that either," Elizabeth countered.

"You're avoiding the question. Where did you pick up this semi-hot man?"

"I met him the other day when I stopped to visit my parents." Elizabeth let out an exasperated breath.

Jess narrowed her eyes. "Your parents are dead."

Elizabeth rolled her eyes on response. "Wow, really? Thanks for the update."

Jess stopped and was silent for a moment while she worked that our in her head. Finally she spoke. "You picked up a guy in a graveyard?" She studied Elizabeth. "I can't decide that that's whacked as fuck or awesome!"

"How about we just go with awesome?" Elizabeth's sarcasm was on point, and Jess took the hint and changed the subject, distracting Elizabeth.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Henry felt like he barely slept, yet he wasn't tired at all. He was nervous about his date, and it made him nervous to be nervous. Even as a teen, he hadn't specifically been wary of dating. He was always friendly with the girls he dated, so it was sort of an extension of their friendship. It was never weird or awkward. This was completely different and he felt out of his league.

Elizabeth was an unusual mix of bold and shy, charming and kind, but saucy and sarcastic at the same time. Henry had trouble reading her. She didn't seem to respond the way he thought she would and it was both confusing and endearing.

He checked his reflection in the door on his way out of his apartment. Never in his life had he checked to see what he looked like before a date. It had never been an issue, but now, he wanted to look his best. Henry wanted to impress Elizabeth. He thought he looked good in his white polo shirt with the upturned collar, button fly Levis light washed jeans, and leather boat shoes. Satisfied, he slung his brown leather coat over his shoulder and headed to his car.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Henry slowly walked up the stairs gathering his courage. He was frustrated with himself. Elizabeth was the one that had essentially asked him out. She obviously liked him well enough to do that, so what was the big deal? Reaching the top step, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Stop being dumb," he muttered. Turning the corner, he made his way down the hall to Elizabeth's room.

He knocked softly on her door before turning toward the sounds in the room opposite Elizabeth's. She was leaning against the desk joking with a friend. His heart caught in his throat as he watched her. She was beautiful and her laugh had him entranced. Finally, he stepped forward and knocked on the doorframe. "You seem to be enjoying yourself. Mind If I intrude?"

"Henry," she sucked in a sharp breath as she spoke. Henry was certainly handsome,and even Jess's sudden silence indicated that she was thinking the same thing. "I finished getting ready early and Jess was helping me pass the time, so I wasn't just pacing my bedroom waiting for you to arrive. Jess, this is Henry. Henry, Jess."

He grinned. "That makes me feel better. I'm a little nervous too." He stepped back into the hallway so Elizabeth could exit, and then stuck his head back into the room. "Nice to meet you Jess." She gave a slight wave and Henry pulled the door shut.

On the way to the restaurant, they chatted about the weather, how classes were going, and the student government Halloween party coming up. Conversation seemed to come easily enough and they both relaxed a little. They had a long wait to get a table, then a longer wait to get their food and by the time that their meals arrived, things started getting awkward.

Elizabeth sat across from Henry and sipped her soda. They had run out of non-committal things to talk about twenty minutes prior and were now having a stilted conversation punctuated by long silences.

Henry glanced up from his empty plate and studied Elizabeth. She looked beautiful, but bored. "Maybe we should go?" he offered.

"Yeah, I guess so. Dinner was nice." Elizabeth smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes and Henry inwardly grimaced. This was why he didn't date people he didn't know first. They didn't know each other well enough to really have the kind of deep conversations he loved, and that he thought she loved. The things they had in common, weren't things people talked about, especially on a date. Now, he wasn't sure they would ever get to the point where they could really talk, and it saddened him.

Once back at her dorm, he walked her to her room. "Thank you for going to dinner with me." Elizabeth looked up and met his gaze. She desperately wanted there to be something more. She still felt butterflies when their eyes met. Maybe they just needed to get to know each other a little better.

"Would you like to come in?" she asked, her blush betraying her forward persona.

The question caught Henry off guard. "I-I don't expect that. We just had dinner, and honestly, it didn't go all that well. I think we should just stop while we're ahead."

"Yeah. You're right. Sorry. I don't know what I was thinking." Elizabeth backpedaled, embarrassed, and unsure how to save face at this point.

This was painful. Henry could see that he was making things worse and looked for a way to try and salvage the situation. "Look," he started. When she looked up, those blue eyes made him second guess himself. He took a breath. "I'm attracted to you, but I'm not one to be physical without really knowing the person I'm with." He could see the doubt in her eyes. "Maybe under different circumstances." He took her hand and squeezed it. "Goodnight Elizabeth." Then he turned and walked away.

Elizabeth stood for just a moment and then slipped behind her door. She exhaled slowly. It wasn't a good date. She knew that, having been on bad dates before. Usually though, she chalked it up to life experience and wasn't bothered by it, but this was different. For whatever reason, Elizabeth thought she'd lost so much more than just an evening. She quickly stripped her clothes and traded them for a t-shirt and shorts before climbing into bed.

Henry made it to his car and slumped down in the seat. The night hadn't gone the way he'd hoped at all, and he was unexplainably saddened by it. He liked Elizabeth, or at least he thought he did, and the hurt look in her eyes made his heart ache. He crawled back out of the car, and as he made his way back up to her room, he had no idea what he was going to say. Finding himself in front of her door, he had his hand raised to knock, but suddenly decided against it and grabbed the marker dangling from a string that was pinned next to a notepad on her door. He quickly wrote a note and left.

Elizabeth wandered to the bathroom down the hall just after sunrise the next morning and the green scribble on her post-it pad caught her attention as she returned and opened her door. "If you ever need to talk, give me a call. Henry." Below, he had written his phone number. She sighed and pulled the note off and stuck it on the inside of her door under her jackets,before trudging over and climbing back into bed.


	5. Chapter 5

AN: Happy Friday! Here's your next installment. I hope you enjoy it.

Chapter 5

New Year's Day 1987

Elizabeth opened her eyes slowly. There was a chill in the air. She pulled her quilt up a little higher under her chin and tried to lay still, hoping she could fall back asleep. After an hour, she gave up and crawled out from beneath the covers. Shivering, she immediately pulled on a sweatshirt and sweatpants and made her way down to the bathroom.

She had returned to campus the day before. Having spent three weeks at Aunt Joan's was more than enough family time, so when Will announced that he was going skiing and Joan was off on another work trip, Elizabeth decided to return to school. At least her room at school was hers. She never felt at home at Joan's condo. It was too harsh and modern. Everything there made her feel like an unwelcome guest. She realized this had more to do with her own state of mind than anything Joan had ever done, but she was still more comfortable alone in her empty dorm than she was at Joan's empty condo.

She stood at the window looking out over the campus, blanketed in a fresh layer of snow. A couple of inches had fallen overnight. Elizabeth was mesmerized by the beauty, and she felt the need to visit the cemetery and go to her parents' grave. She always enjoyed the solitude there and she felt like she could hear them better when she was close to them.

Elizabeth turned into the cemetery and was surprised to see tire tracks on the road so early in the morning, especially as cold as it was. She made her way through the cemetery and parked close to the exit. Walking through the snow, she paused in front of the grave. She brushed the snow from it and stood for a moment.

Her eyes were drawn to her right and she saw that Henry had been there before her. The snow was disturbed, large patches of dead grass showing through the snow. It somehow seemed out of place and Elizabeth walked down. What she saw surprised her. There were several beer cans laying about. Elizabeth frowned. That didn't seem like something Henry would do, but she'd never known anyone else to visit like he did. As she turned, she took notice of Tommy's headstone, which had been wiped clean. _Beloved son and friend, Thomas Michael Johnson, December 14, 1964-January 1, 1976._

"Shit," she murmured. Quickly picking up the beer cans, she hurried back to her car and headed back to her room, with a single purpose-find Henry.

She ran up the stairs, depositing the cans in the trash can at the end of the hall. Unlocking her door, she reached around and pushed the coats hanging on the back of her door out of the way, exposing the post-it note, still untouched from the morning after their date when she stuck it there. She pulled it off the door and picked up the phone.

The phone rang several times and went unanswered. Hearing Henry's voice on the answering machine, Elizabeth wasn't sure what she was going to say. At the beep, she hesitated, then gave up any thought of decorum and spoke from her heart. "Henry, it's Elizabeth. I know what today is and you shouldn't be alone. Call and let me know you're okay. If you're by yourself, I'll come over, and whatever you do, don't be drinking and driving okay?" Elizabeth twisted the phone cord around her finger. "Just know I'm thinking about you, and I want you to be safe. Bye."

She hung up the phone and stared at it. It was possible that he went to a friend's house. Maybe he was surrounded by family. He'd probably wonder why she'd called. Elizabeth ran her hand through her hair and sighed. Maybe she'd overreacted. Then the phone rang.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Henry wasn't exactly sure what the problem was. Tommy died 11 years ago. He'd dealt with all of this shit. Sure, he always remembered, but he hadn't been this upset in years. Today, it seemed overwhelming. He could still feel his cheek burning as he pressed his face to the ice next to the hole, reaching into the water, swinging his hand wildly, trying to grasp anything, anything that might save Tommy. He pulled himself from his bed. He had to go sit with Tommy. He was the caretaker.

Henry found himself at the liquor store, surprised that they were open on New Years, but thankful nonetheless. He could at least drink his sadness away. With a twelve pack tucked under his arm, he marched out and, after brushing the snow off of the headstone, sat at the foot of Tommy's grave. He didn't speak for a long time. After about five beers, he spent a fair amount of time yelling at Tommy for being so stupid. He should've known not to skate so close to the middle.

He cried over the loss of his friend. He shed the tears that his father said he was too old to let go-the tears he had held onto all of these eleven years. Nine beers in, he realized how angry he really was at his own father, for forcing him to internalize his grief. He threw the half empty beer can at the stone and watched it explode.

Henry didn't remember drinking the other three, nor the drive home, but he was most certainly passed out on his couch. As he started to come to, the phone was ringing. It seemed fuzzy and far away, but he'd know the voice coming from the answering machine anywhere. He felt like his heart was being squeezed in his chest. There were so many times he'd thought about Elizabeth over the past few months, but he never called her, and now she was calling to check on him.

He stumbled over to the phone and hit call back on his phone. It rang a few times before she picked up. "Hello?" she answered. When he didn't answer right away, she asked, "Henry?"

"Yeah," he responded, but could come up with nothing else to say.

"Are you okay? There were beer cans all over Tommy's grave."

Henry let out a long sigh, and squeezed his eyes shut to keep the latest round of tears at bay. "No. I'm not okay at all." His voice cracked.

Elizabeth was already pulling on her shoes. "Henry, what's your address?" There was silence on the other end. "Where do you live Henry?" Her voice had increased in both volume and edginess. "You have no business being alone."

Finally, she got some sort of answer that sounded like an address and she told him to hang on and she hung up, grabbing her coat and purse on the way out the door.

With the campus and surrounding area as desolate as it was over an extended holiday, Elizabeth decided that she didn't really need Henry's address. It was pretty easy to find his car parked in the snow-covered lawn, right in front of his apartment building at the edge of campus. He'd even left the keys in it. She shook her head and moved the car into a parking space on the side of the building.

Elizabeth knocked on apartment C and waited. She was just about to decide that Henry was drunk enough that he gave her the wrong apartment, when the door opened and she found a greatly disheveled Henry standing in front of her.

"Hey," she said softly. He returned the greeting and they stood there. Finally, she prompted, "Can I come in?"

Henry stepped back, allowing her to step inside. He pushed the door shut and turned to her. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" she asked.

"Sorry for being like this. Sorry for not calling you. Sorry for all of it."

"I'm not concerned about that right now. I'm worried about you." And without another word, she wrapped her fingers around his wrist and ushered him over to the couch. When he sat down, she moved into the kitchen and filled a glass with water. Returning, she handed it to him and sat next to him on the couch. She kicked off her shoes and turned to face Henry, pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. Henry looked at her curiously, her eyes, which were sometimes a bright, transparent blue, had now taken on a deeper hue. With her chin resting on her knee, she asked, "Will you tell me about Tommy?"

Henry's jaw clenched and he sucked in a ragged breath, somehow trying to figure out how to go about putting words to the events of that day. He felt her touch and looked down where he hand rested on his arm. "I don't want to know about that. I want to hear why he was your friend. Tell me the good times."

Elizabeth watched as Henry relaxed just a bit. She said nothing, waiting for him to speak. There was a long silence. Elizabeth was just about to give in to the notion that they would just sit beside each other all afternoon because he didn't feel comfortable sharing with her, when he said, "It was my first day of second grade. I walked into the classroom with my friends. Most all of us in the class had been together since we were old enough to walk. At Our Lady of Good Counsel, there was a mother's group and most of our moms attended. As soon as I hit the door, I saw a red-headed, freckle faced boy sitting in the middle of the room, his mother speaking with Sr. Josetta. Quietly, we all found our desks and sat down. I thought it was unlucky that I ended up next to this new kid, whoever he was."

"I sized him up and he gave me a devilish grin and told me that he'd placed a rubber snake in Sr. Josetta's drawer when she wasn't looking. I wasn't sure I believed him, but mid-morning when Josetta screamed bloody murder, I glanced at Tommy and grinned. In that moment we became best friends." Elizabeth laughed and Henry joined her.

Henry continued to tell stories of their antics for the next few hours until the buzz had worn off and the realization that he hadn't slept at all their night before hit him hard. He was in mid-sentence when he dozed off. Elizabeth moved from the couch and pulled a blanket off the back of a chair, covering Henry, before curling up in the same chair with a book and eventually dozing off herself. Henry woke a few hours later, surprised to find that he was covered and Elizabeth was asleep in the chair opposite him.

He didn't move for fear that he would somehow break the silence with his actions and wake her. Elizabeth's head was leaning back into the cushion of the chair, legs tucked under her and arms wrapped protectively around herself. Her blonde waves fell down over her shoulders and Henry couldn't stop staring. She was beautiful and compassionate. How many people would call to check up on someone they had a rather lackluster date with and then come spend their holiday with the person just to be sure they were okay? Certainly not many people.

The longer he stared, the closer he wanted to be. He shook his head suddenly, trying to rid himself of those thoughts. They weren't helpful. They had tried and it hadn't worked. He sat up on the couch more fully and stretched. Sensing his movement, Elizabeth opened her eyes. "You're awake," she acknowledged.

"Yeah, thanks. It was very nice of you to come over here to make sure I was okay. You didn't have to do that."

"No. I didn't have to. I chose to. I'm a caretaker, remember."


	6. Chapter 6

AN: When I got the idea for this story, I sort of thought readers might find it kind of creepy and no one would go for it. Your reviews have said the opposite, so thank you very much. I appreciate your kind words.

Chapter 6

Elizabeth ordered a pizza and they ate silently while watching TV. She took a chance to sneak a peek at Henry. He was looking in the direction of the TV, but he wasn't watching. He looked like he was thinking. His light brown tousled hair and tanned skin accentuated his square jaw and deep brown eyes. He had relaxed back into the couch, his empty plate balanced on his leg, his fingers laced behind his head. He turned to face her and she blushed, having been caught staring.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing. Just making sure you're alright," she fibbed. Elizabeth didn't really know why she'd been studying him in the first place, but she could tell that the warmth that flourished in her belly did not stem from her concern about his grief. The feelings unnerved her. Elizabeth had never been a person who could not control her emotions. Quite to the contrary, she was exceptional at it. It was true that she didn't need to wear the mask as much anymore, but anytime her emotions became too much, the walls went up immediately, an impenetrable facade.

Henry smiled. "I'll be fine. I appreciate you coming over. It was nice not to spend the day alone, wallowing." She nodded. She knew exactly what he meant.

Elizabeth pulled herself to stand. "I should go then. Let me know if you need anything." Henry sat his plate on the coffee table and joined her.

Moving toward the door, suddenly he was right in front of her. For a split second, she thought he was going to kiss her and her lips parted slightly in anticipation. But he didn't. He reached in front of her to grab her coat and held it out so she could put it on. Elizabeth blinked and slid her arms into the heavy coat, inwardly cringing for thinking he was going to kiss her and upset that he didn't. Her expression gave away none of this. She only smiled and thanked him and was out the door.

After she'd left, Henry felt once again like he'd squandered the opportunity in front of him. Elizabeth often occupied Henry's thoughts, and she'd been in front of him, and, if he had to guess, he thought that she may be willing to entertain another date. Yet, he said nothing and let her get away again.

MSMSMSMSMSMSMS

The winter doldrums were in full force toward the end of February and the entirety of campus was wondering if the cold, wet winter would ever leave. Henry was frustrated with his own inability to concentrate. He'd spent the past three hours in the library supposedly doing research for a paper, but had made little progress. He could blame the writings for being too technical and difficult or the subject matter for being too boring, but the real problem sat on the far end of the library with her head stuck in a book.

Since New Year's Day, Elizabeth had taken up permanent residence in Henry's thoughts. If Henry weren't being so stubborn, he would have called her, but he was set in the notion that they had tried and failed, which was why he didn't understand what he was doing in the library right now. He didn't need to be there and hadn't for a few weeks, but yet, he spent at least two hours everyday in this spot just beyond the large support column in the center of the library. He spent the time watching her.

It happened by accident. He'd been in the stacks searching for a book and Elizabeth walked by, not seeing him, with an armload full of books, unceremoniously dropping them on the table at the end of the large room. She sat down and got straight to work and Henry was mesmerized. He took his book and sat just enough behind the column to be out of Elizabeth's line of sight, but he could still see her.

After a few times of showing up and seeing her in the same spot, Henry fell into a pattern. He brought his work to the library, just so he could see Elizabeth.

At the far end of the library, Elizabeth leaned back and let out a frustrated huff. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Henry with a book in his lap and a pile next to him. She was pretty good about pushing things to the side if she didn't want to deal with them, but Henry's near constant presence was becoming a problem. He'd been in the same spot three times over the past week, and once she saw him, she couldn't get him out of her head. He even followed her into her dreams.

Loading her backpack, Elizabeth stood and crossed the spanse and stopped directly in front of Henry. "What are you doing?" she asked.

Henry was dumbstruck. He didn't realize she even knew he was there, and now she was standing in front of him, staring down at him with those piercing blue eyes. He squirmed under her gaze. "Studying," he replied. "And it's nice to see you too by the way."

"It's a great coincidence that you are studying every time I'm studying. What gives McCord?" Elizabeth dropped her backpack and stood with her arms crossed in front of her, waiting for an answer.

Henry thought there were a couple ways he could go about this, but he didn't have the time or headspace to concoct a reasonable story in the next few seconds, so he went with the truth. She was standing close to his chair, so when he stood, he was most certainly in her personal space, but she didn't step back. "I think about you all of the time. We already know it won't work, but yet, when I close my eyes, I see you. I do come here to study, but I choose to come when I know you'll be here just so we can be in the same space."

He stood close enough to her that when he spoke, his hot breath fanned across her face. It stoked the fire that had been smouldering for a great while. Luckily, it only took a moment for her to compose herself enough to meet his gaze. "The table is large enough for two. Hiding behind the column is weird I suppose I'll see you tomorrow." Stepping to the side, she bent down to grab her backpack and then she was headed down the steps. Henry released the breath he'd been holding. He definitely had study plans for the following day.

And so it went. Most days they studied at the same table, many times not even speaking. Instead they stole glances at each other, every once in a while catching the other looking. They would both blush and turn away.

During spring break, they each thought of calling the other, but didn't. They both decided on their own, that theirs was a relationship of could've been instead of ever will be, and that's just the way it was until Henry sat alone at their study table wondering where Elizabeth was. He absentmindedly wrote the date at the top of his paper and gasped. April 7th. He pushed his books off the table into his backpack and rushed from the library.

Ten minutes later, he stood outside her door, out of breath from running across campus. He knocked on the door. "Elizabeth. Open up." Enough time passed that he thought she may be ignoring him, but then he heard her turn the knob. When she opened the door, Henry was taken back to the day he first saw her four years ago. She looked much the same, with her red-rimmed eyes and tear streaked face. The pain was just as raw today as it was then. He skipped the formalities and stepped inside without asking. He pushed the door shut, removed his jacket, and dropped his backpack, sweeping her into his embrace. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize what day it was until I had to write the date. I'm sorry it took me so long to get here."

He shuffled them to her bed and they sat together, her cuddled against his side, for a long while. Finally, he asked, "Do you want to talk about them?"

Elizabeth sat with that question a long while. Her voice cracked when she spoke."My biggest regret is that I should've gone that day." She looked up at him with wide, sad eyes. "If I'd been there, maybe things would've turned out differently."

"You could've ended up dead," Henry said, a little defensive.

"Would that have been so bad?" She closed her eyes, letting the tears seep from them. It was the same thought that she'd had so many times. Why couldn't she have been taken too?

"That would be awful. Please don't ever say that." She looked up at Henry, confusion apparent.

"Why do you care?"

Her question unsettled him. Why did he care? Was he brave enough to put everything on the line and speak from the heart?"

He was quiet for a moment. "Elizabeth, you are smart, funny, caring, loving, beautiful, and so much more. I spend entirely too much time thinking about you and how I wish things had happened differently between us. You are the love I lost before ever really having. I care deeply for you, and no, I would never think you would be better off dead."

Elizabeth listened to his words and took them in. It really described how she thought of him as well, but she didn't know what to do with that information. "Yeah," she trailed off. After a moment, she started telling Henry stories about her family and the tone changed completely. An hour later, Elizabeth was sitting in the middle of the bed telling Henry the story of her dad teaching Will to fish and him falling in the lake. She was laughing and Henry couldn't keep from staring. She was beautiful and her laughter was infectious. He wanted to be around it all of the time. He wanted to be around Elizabeth all of the time. Elizabeth noticed and quieted. "What?" she asked.

"Nothing," Henry murmured, smiling. "Tell me more."

When Henry was certain that he was leaving her in a better place than he found her, he mentioned going home. She got up off the bed and he followed suit. He moved to grab his jacket, but she stopped him, taking his hand instead. She stared at where their hands were joined and spoke. "Thanks for spending the afternoon with me. Usually I dread this day for weeks ahead of time and it's always worse than I think it will be, but you being here, made it so much better." Henry took his finger and lifted her chin so he could look at her. He bent down to kiss her forehead, but before he could get past the thought of doing that, her hand had gripped his neck, pulling him to her mouth.

Just before their lips touched, Henry murmured, "This may not be wise."

"Yeah," she whispered, closing the distance.

Elizabeth's lips sent a wave of warmth through his body and he wanted to pull back, to stop the floodgates from being broken down, but when her tongue brushed his lower lip, his body took over. His lips parted, allowing her in. As their kiss deepened, his arm banded around her, pulling her flush to his body. What started as a warmth became a fire when she melded herself to him. Months of pent up longing and emotion was poured out in that kiss, and when they broke, they both knew the genie could not be returned to the bottle.

"I'm going to go now," he said, breaking away. "Will I see you tomorrow?"

"Maybe," she said offhandedly, assuming her aloofness once again. Henry left the building wondering exactly where they stood. He supposed he would find out tomorrow.


	7. Chapter 7

AN: Someone asked why H/E were being so resistant to giving it another go. In my mind, it's because Elizabeth has it in her head that she isn't really meant to have anyone, so she isn't receptive and Henry just follows her lead for the most part, but he's always that one that is more up front about his feelings, and she takes a longer time to work around to that. Those were my thoughts when writing at least. :)

Chapter 7

For the next three days, Henry sat alone at their table in the library. He wondered where she was. Was she still reeling from the anniversary of her parents' deaths? Perhaps, but if she needed him, she knew where to find him. Was she upset about the kiss? She shouldn't be, she initiated it. Or maybe she was embarrassed or maybe she thought he'd taken advantage of her when she was vulnerable? There were millions of maybes. He decided he was going to give her space.

Over the next couple of weeks, he tried, and he thought he did a fairly good job of it, although it was almost killing him. He saw her in her new study spot in the library. She gave him a wan smile before dropping her head back into her books. Then, he saw her walking out of the Student Union coffee shop, but he didn't approach her. He turned to walk away, but stealing one last glance, he caught her watching. She turned and hurried down the street. The ultimate slight was when they bumped into each other at a party and they were both drunk. For a split second they both entertained the idea of spending time together, but then it was gone as soon as it came and she disappeared into the crowd without a word.

Henry chastised himself daily. There was no reason for him to be this infatuated with a girl that he'd gone out with and had a miserable time, and who now, after kissing him, wanted nothing to do with him. Yet, he remembered her sitting with him on New Year's, and how she'd cuddled into his side while she grieved her parents, and then there was that kiss. There was no way she could not have feelings for him. He certainly had feelings for her.

Henry hadn't slept in what seemed like forever, and he had had enough. He was going to find Elizabeth and hash it out.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Elizabeth was beside herself. All attempts of shutting down her feelings for Henry were futile. It was like her heart was in denial, and her brain was starting to join in. For some reason, it thought falling for Henry McCord was the most natural thing ever.

And there was a moment when she wanted it to be. She'd asked him out. She wanted it to work, but then it didn't. It solidified her original notion that it was best she was alone. Try as she might, Elizabeth couldn't deny the connection they had, or the attraction. It had been nearly three weeks and she could still go weak in the about that kiss.

Elizabeth saw him here and there on campus and there was the night at the party. She knew he was about to offer to take her somewhere they could talk, but she didn't have that kind of resolve. In a drunken state, she would likely spill her guts and tell Henry that he occupied every thought she had every day and had for a long time. Then they would make out and who knows where that might lead. The dampness in her panties told her where she wished it would lead.

She was walking back to her dorm thinking all of this and as she climbed the steps, she mumbled. "Jesus Lizzie, you need to get over him."

"I tend to disagree," Henry said, pulling to a stand on the top step. Elizabeth's shock was evident. "I thought I'd wait for you. We need to talk."

"Henry, no," she whispered, her voice shaking. "I can't. We shouldn't." Elizabeth walked past him and unlocked her door.

"Can we just talk? Look. I get it. I didn't want to admit it either, but there's something between us. Something real."

"It won't last Henry. It's best we just go our separate ways."

"Best for who, Elizabeth? Because it certainly isn't the best for me. It would be different if I knew you didn't feel anything for me, but I know that isn't true. Just talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking that you should go," she said, pushing the door shut. Henry stood in the hallway for several minutes thinking she would come out and they would talk, but that never happened. Finally he turned and walked back down the hall, his heart broken.

The following day was Thursday, Henry's day to go to the cemetery. When he pulled in, he saw Elizabeth's car. Part of him thought about turning around and leaving. Then the underlying anger took over the hurt and he decided that he wasn't going to let Elizabeth dictate his actions. This is what he did on Thursdays and she wasn't going to stop him. She was the one with the problem, not him.

He crossed the grass, walking toward Tommy's grave. Henry stopped in his tracks when he saw Elizabeth. She was doubled over in front of his friend's grave, sobbing. "Help him understand why I can't be with him. Help him be at peace."

Henry watched carefully, no longer concerned with his own hurt, only hers. He wanted to go to her, but his body wouldn't move. He stayed away and observed her. After a few minutes, she wiped her eyes and stood. She started to turn away.

Henry stepped forward. "You know what Tommy always said to me when I wanted to play it safe and not take the chance?" Elizabeth whipped around to face him.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

"It's Thursday. It's what I do." Henry shrugged.

They stood there, each staring at the ground for a long while. "Are you going to tell me what Tommy used to say?"

He looked at her curiously. "Every time I was being a wuss about something and wanted to sit out, he'd say, 'McCord, if you're gonna sit your ass on the bench and miss recess, it might as well be because you did something great.'" Henry looked like he'd just laid the wisest nugget of knowledge at Elizabeth's feet.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" she wrinkled her nose in confusion.

"It means that there's always a chance in life that bad things will happen, but do you want to always be sitting on the sideline and miss all of the awesome stuff life has to offer because you're scared of the bad?" Henry moved toward Elizabeth. "If I were in your shoes, I would be terrified to allow myself to fall for someone, but I promise, I won't hurt you. I love you Elizabeth." Henry stopped, surprised at his own words. "Wow." Henry took a deep breath. "I didn't realize it until now, but think I do love you, and I know you have feelings for me. I'm just asking you to give us a chance."

He watched as Elizabeth shifted from one foot to the other and he considered the fact that she hadn't turned on her heel and fled a victory. She looked up at him. "It's so scary to put yourself out there. I've been closed off for a long time. I don't really know how…"

He reached out and caught her fingers in his. "Yes you do. You're a caretaker."

A small smile played at the corners of her mouth. "Thanks Henry. This is something I need to think about. I still don't know."

Henry nodded. He kept hold of her hand and stepped in quickly and kissed her softly. "Just in case I never get another opportunity." Letting go of her hand, he turned and walked away.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Elizabeth wandered over to where her parents were laid and ran her hand over the headstone. "I wish you were here to tell me what to do," she murmured as a fresh set of tears threatened to fall. Elizabeth's hand fell to her side and she walked back to her car.

She finished the semester and returned to Aunt Joan's for the summer. Not a day passed that Elizabeth didn't feel the deep loss of letting Henry go. She almost called him half a dozen times, but she never could quite make herself do it.

As August rolled around, she made plans to help get Will moved into school before she returned to UVA, which meant that Elizabeth moved in the night before classes started. It wasn't until the following week that she ventured out to the cemetery, coincidentally on a Thursday afternoon.

Elizabeth's smile was wide when she pulled into the cemetery and saw Henry's car parked next to the road. She pulled around to the opposite side and got out, making her way across to him.

Henry looked up and was obviously taken aback at seeing her. "Hey there," she said, her smile bright.

"Elizabeth," he said, his smile friendly, but not making it all the way to his eyes. "Did you have a nice summer?"

"No," she replied. "Not really. I did a lot of thinking about us."

"Elizabeth, please," Henry tried to interrupt.

"No, let me finish," she said, her resolve strengthened. She was going to get this out. She'd practiced it for weeks. "Henry, I think I'm ready to-"

"Elizabeth, stop!" Henry said forcefully, cutting her off before she could get the important part out. She looked over Henry's shoulder to see a pretty young woman with long black hair walking up. Henry noticed her shift in gaze and turned around. The woman slipped an arm around Henry's waist. "Elizabeth Adams, I want you to meet my girlfriend, Rochana Bhuvanath."


	8. Chapter 8

AN: You guys! Thanks so much for the fabulous reviews. I kind of thought you'd really hate me. It was nice to know that even if you hate Rochanna, you sort of like the story. As a thanks, you can have the next chapter a day early.

Chapter 8

Elizabeth felt like she'd been punched in the gut, but she smiled and gave the perfunctory "nice to meet you," before stepping back. She needed to put physical distance between Henry and herself. "It's good to see you. Catch you around sometime." She turned and moved back toward her parents' graves.

She sat down and reached out to touch the smooth stone. It was unduly warm, having absorbed all of the Virginia summer sun. Pulling her hand back quickly before she got burned, she laid it in her lap. Her parents had a deep love of each other and their children. She continued to come to the cemetery to try and hold onto their love. But being here now, unable to even touch the symbol of them, Elizabeth felt like she had a new understanding of her station in life. Love would always be around her, but never again would she be part of it.

She stayed in the spot until it was nearly dark and then wandered to her car. This situation was of her own doing. Her hesitancy was the cause. Henry couldn't be expected to wait forever. Henry was smart and handsome. It was difficult to guess how many women had shown interest in him, and thinking that she'd never come around, he accepted one of his suitors.

Rochana was a pretty girl and Elizabeth hated her, even though she knew it was unfair. Rochana could be an absolutely delightful person, but she possessed the one thing Elizabeth coveted-Henry's love. As with so many other things, she pushed the hurt deep down and buried herself in her studies.

October rolled around and Elizabeth had managed to avoid Henry altogether for the most part, only seeing him from a distance a few times. Each time, Rochana was hanging on him, and the sight made Elizabeth's chest physically ache. No amount of self talk was helping to ease her pain.

Jess had been hounding Elizabeth to get into the social scene, convinced that it was time to pick up a guy; she would quickly, if only she would put herself out there. It was true that Elizabeth had shut down a number of guys who'd expressed an interest in her, but she truly didn't think she was ready for any kind of relationship, even a temporary one-the hurt was still too raw.

Of course Jess didn't know about Henry. No one knew. They had never really been anything official, so there were no questions, no friends checking in on her, no diversions, except Jess's offer of copious amounts of liquor and loud music on a Saturday night.

Wanting to just forget for awhile, she agreed to go and emerged from her room in a shimmery navy sheath with black tights and black heeled boots and a black leather jacket. Jess gritted her teeth and mumbled something about Elizabeth needing to wear a potato sack and proceeded to drag her to the Beta House.

It was nearing midnight and Elizabeth found a little corner to tuck herself away. She needed to collect herself. She had been groped more times than she could keep track of and was feeling a strong buzz. Elizabeth felt like she wasn't in any shape to be weaving through the crowds to find her way out of the house, much less walking the four blocks back to her dorm. Leaning her head back against the wall, she closed her eyes and tried to wait out her drunkenness.

Unaware of the time that passed, Elizabeth opened her eyes and looked around the still crowded room. She gasped when she thought she saw Rochana making out with someone. Stepping out of her nook, Elizabeth moved forward to get a better look. It was most certainly Rochana and most certainly not Henry.

A fury built in Elizabeth that she had never known before and it only took a moment for her to confront Rochana. She stood in front of the woman and teetered on her high heeled boots, her body not quite operating on the same plane as her mind. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

When nothing happened, Elizabeth pushed on Rochana. "Seriously? This is how you're treating Henry?" She folded her arms across her chest and waited. The man Rochana was all over pulled her off of him and Elizabeth watched Rochanas's features harden.

"Bitch," she spat, shoving Elizabeth hard. Elizabeth, unprepared for the onslaught, stumbled backwards, landing against a couple burly frat boys who caught her before she fell and pushed her back toward Rochana, now interested to see how this little cat fight might play out.

"I've done nothing to you." Elizabeth tried to hold her voice steady, but in her shocked and drunken state, she heard the crack in her voice as she spoke.

"Right. Nothing but taking Henry from me. Come on." She turned her attention to the guy she'd been kissing and tugged him through the crowd. He turned over his shoulder giving Elizabeth a confused expression that she felt was equal to her own.

The crowd quickly dissipated once the show was over and Elizabeth made her way out the door. Snow had fallen over the last few hours and Elizabeth pulled her jacket tighter around her as the heavy, wet snow continued to fall. Still drunk, she stumbled several times before she ended up leaning against a streetlamp and pulling her boots off. She plodded on, only slightly aware of the cold, and was surprised to find herself in front of Henry's door, where she slumped down, too tired to do anything else.

MSMSMSMSMSMS

Henry and Rochana left the cemetery that August afternoon and Henry was inexplicably sad. He'd made the decision to move on once two months had passed with no word from Elizabeth. He met Rochana at a 4th of July celebration and they hit it off. She was smart and pretty. They had progressed physically faster than any relationship he'd ever had, and he couldn't decide if that was good or bad. The sex was good, but it seemed that they had fallen into a pattern of having sex to avoid talking to each other. It was something that before Elizabeth he would've never considered, but he felt that his refusal to be physical was part of the reason that he and Elizabeth would never be. Suddenly he wasn't as opposed.

That night, Rochana lay sprawled across Henry's chest sleeping deeply. He lay wide awake, thinking about Elizabeth and the devastation that was all over her face. She was going to tell him that she was ready, but he had to cut her off. He couldn't let her say it, for both of their sakes. As they left the cemetery, Elizabeth was sitting in front of her parents' grave, her head down. His heart broke for her, and he lied, convincing himself that he had moved on.

Time passed and little things with Rochana started getting on his nerves. Whenever he tried to talk to her, she dominated every conversation, cutting him off so that he was never able to contribute. She often expected Henry to follow her blindly, participating in whatever hairbrained scheme she had come up with. In the beginning, it had been exciting, but the new wore off quickly and by the end of September, he was looking for a way out.

As he became more dissatisfied with his relationship with Rochana, the more he longed for the comfort he found when he was with Elizabeth. It became all consuming. He thought he was over her, but he'd seen her a handful of times on campus and both the familiar warmth and severe pain in his chest washed over him.

Rochana was very pragmatic. She kept Henry close because he looked good on her arm. She knew he wasn't the one she wanted forever. In fact, she wasn't sure she wanted a man long term at all, but Henry fulfilled a certain need she had now.

She was already annoyed that Henry had fallen asleep immediately after their latest physical encounter, and then her blood boiled when he mumbled a name in his sleep. It wasn't her name, but another woman's. She pushed off and roughly shook him. Henry roused slowly. "What?" he mumbled.

"You're cheating on me?" she asked, her voice held more anger than hurt. "How dare you!"

Henry blinked, waking more fully.. "No. I've never cheated on you. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Who's Elizabeth?" Rochana spat. Henry's eyes went wide. "You son of a bitch." Rochana rolled out of bed and pulled her clothes on. "Get out and I don't ever want to see you again."

Henry sat up. "Look Rochana. Nothing ever happened. I swear."

"Who is she?" Rochanas's voice was harsh and pointed.

"Someone from my past. You met her at the cemetery," Henry said. "But I haven't seen her since."

"She means something to you?"

Henry thought about how to answer that. "She did," he finally answered.

"Yet you fuck me." Rochana said it as a statement. Henry didn't feel the need to answer it. "You need to leave." Her voice was now even and even though it was full of venom, she was calm. That unnerved Henry.

He stood and put his pants on. "You never wanted this to be permanent. Don't act like you're all that offended. You'll have someone else in your pocket within a week. Goodbye Rochana." Henry tugged his shirt over his head, and walked out of her apartment and out of her life.

Back at his own apartment, Henry stood in the shower, letting the steaming water run over his body. He felt guilty that he wasn't more upset about how things ended with Rochana. He felt like he should've handled things differently. On the other hand, he was free from Rochana, but did he dare reach out to Elizabeth? He knew that he hurt her by dating Rochana. He still loved her, but would she consider dating him after all that had happened? He decided to sleep on it for a few days.

Saturday evening, Henry finally gathered the nerve to call Elizabeth to see how she was. After calling twice and having her not answer, he decided that she was either out or refusing to talk to him. He decided to try again the following day and pulled a beer from the fridge and settled in with a book, revelling in the peace that not dealing with Rochana afforded


	9. Chapter 9

AN: So, this is it. I can't thank you enough for all of the kind words you've offered about this story. I felt it was kind of a left field idea and you have embraced it. The MSec fandom is awesome! Thank you very much.

Chapter 9

Henry was spending his newfound freedom quietly reading on Saturday night. Lying on the couch, he eventually dozed off, but was startled awake by a rustle and thump outside his door. He sat up and made his way to the door and looked out of the peephole. Seeing nothing, he opened the door. He couldn't believe his eyes when he found Elizabeth passed out at his feet.

Quickly, he scooped her up and carried her to his bedroom and placed her on the bed. He scanned her and his breath caught in his throat. She was so beautiful and he missed her so much. He peeled off her soaking wet clothes, wondering why she wasn't wearing her shoes, as he wrestled a t-shirt over her limp body. Then, he tucked her into his bed, placing a warm towel from the dryer at her feet, and adding an extra quilt because she was so cold. He sat beside her and kept vigil for several hours.

Elizabeth woke, but didn't move and she didn't open her eyes or make a sound. Her head hurt and her stomach was rolling, but she didn't know where she was. The orientation of the sun wasn't right for her room. The covers on her felt excessively heavy and she was warm. She had to pee and she didn't know if she could keep from throwing up. Elizabeth struggled to open her eyes. When she did, she didn't recognize where she was. She tried to recall the events of the previous night, and there were a lot of gaps. Elizabeth did vividly remember Rochana pushing her and essentially saying she was the cause of her break up with Henry. Elizabeth didn't understand how that could possibly be the case.

Finally, she rolled over and pushed herself up. Bringing her eyes into focus, she looked around the room. Her dress was neatly hanging through a louvered slat in the closet door and her bra hung on the door handle. Instinctively, her hand went to her chest and she looked down. She was wearing a Marine t-shirt and was definitely missing an undergarment. She was alone in the room. She immediately went to the bathroom and rinsed her mouth out. Passing by the dresser, she noticed a picture sitting on top.

Her hand flew to her mouth to silence the gasp when she realized that it was a picture of what she guessed to be Henry's family, as he was in the back of the grouping. She was embarrassed about how she may have ended up in Henry's bed, but was equally excited about the prospect, now knowing he was no longer with Rochana. She put her bra on and picked up a pair of basketball shorts. Once she pulled the drawstring as tight as possible, she thought they would stay up on her hips. She tiptoed her way to the door and opened it quietly.

Henry was on the couch dozing, a book in his hand. He looked so handsome, Elizabeth was enamored. Just being this close to Henry brought her comfort in a way that she hadn't felt since before her parents died. Of course, just because he and Rochana weren't a thing anymore didn't mean that he would want to be with her. He had moved on. She tried to keep her emotions in check. Quietly, she moved to the chair next to the couch, curled up, waited for Henry to wake.

When Henry opened his eyes, it was midmorning. He sat up, ready to check on Elizabeth, but found her in the chair next to him. She had dozed off waiting, and now Henry had the opportunity to study her again. He decided he would always be in awe of her beauty, and as much as he wanted her to sleep, they needed to talk.

He rose and started a pot of coffee. A few minutes later, he saw her standing in the doorway of the kitchen. "Good morning," he said softly. "I have Tylenol if you need some."

"I'm sorry I ended up here last night. I'm not sure how that happened. Thank you for taking care of me."

Henry had to stifle his immediate response, which would have been something along the lines of always wanting to take care of her. Instead he replied, "I'm glad you came. I want to speak with you anyway."

Elizabeth moved closer and leaned against the counter. "You aren't seeing Rochana anymore," she stated flatly. "And I hear that it's my fault."

Henry was surprised word spread so quickly. "Definitely not your fault. I was in love with you, and that didn't just disappear when Rochana came into the picture. You had nothing to do with how I felt, or how I handled it."

"Was?" Elizabeth dropped her head, realizing that after everything that happened with Rochana, she immediately had hope, but Henry was about to take that once and for all. She was frustrated with herself. Always before, she'd been able to accept her lot in life, good or bad, but it had been shown time and time again that she and Henry would never be more than two people who connected over a tragic loss. It would never be permanent, and she needed to put that longing to rest.

Elizabeth was pulled from her reverie by Henry's finger tucked under her chin, pulling it up. "Look at me," he whispered. When he finally made eye contact, she saw amusement in his eyes. "Am. I am in love with you and I would appreciate it if you could get over your bullheadedness and accept that you love me too."

She stepped back. "I am not bullheaded," she said, trying to pout, but the joy that was building inside her was hard to contain. A smile pulled at the corners of her mouth, and when Henry laughed at her efforts, her giggles burst forth.

Henry moved to close the gap and took her in his arms. "Does this mean you want to entertain the idea of us-together?" The shyness in her expression at that moment took him by surprise. Elizabeth always seemed so confident in what she said and how she acted. It was easy to forget how vulnerable she could be, and she was letting him see that. Elizabeth was letting him in. Henry's face broke out into a wide grin.

"I think I'd like to entertain that idea Mr. McCord." An equal mix of excitement and trepidation coursed through her. "I'm scared Henry. I tried to protect myself, and I failed miserably. I'm head over heels in love with you. These last couple months have been so hard. If I lost you again, I don't think I could," she trailed off. "Henry, please, just tell me this is for real."

"It's so very real. Do you want to know how real it is?" Elizabeth nodded slightly and looked up, waiting for Henry to continue. He squeezed her a little tighter. "It's so real that one day I'm going to marry you, and we're going to have the most beautiful babies, and live our lives together raising those babies before spending our retirement sitting in rocking chairs and holding hands. Is that real enough for you?"

Elizabeth couldn't stop the smile that played on her lips. "That is pretty real. I think that sounds exactly like the kind of real I want to live." She squirmed in his arms and giggled.

"What?" he asked.

"I was just wondering when you're going to kiss me."

He smiled and lowered his head so he was hovering over her lips. "You aren't a very patient person," he murmured.

"I'm not," she agreed, raising up on her toes, closing the distance. Her lips barely brushed Henry's when he tightened his hold on her. He kissed her, gently at first, but then, as they both relaxed, the kiss became more passionate. Elizabeth pushed herself back, breaking contact. Her heart pounded in her ears and she watched Henry slowly open his eyes.

"Can I take you home to meet my parents?" he asked, still holding her against him. "I'm thinking maybe Thanksgiving."

"Oh Henry." She placed her hands on his chest. "I don't know."

"I mean, you're going to be my wife. Don't you think you're going to have to meet them sometime?" he teased. She shrugged.

"Meeting your parents sounds scary."

"My father is scary, but my mom is okay. Besides, they will love you because I love you." He kissed her again. "Come on."

She laughed, "Where are we going?"

"You're going to introduce me to your parents."

An hour later, Henry and Elizabeth stood holding hands in front of Ben and Suzanne Adams's grave. Elizabeth took a deep breath. "Mom, Dad, this is Henry McCord. I'm going to be bringing him around a lot. He's a caretaker too."


End file.
